Yes, this may sound strange, but it has been noticed that couples have commonly soft corner for each other and hidden sweet memories of their past lives they have lived together. Spontaneous decision at the heat of the moment may force a person to declare, "I do not love you anymore" or "I am leaving." but soon he or she may perceive that this announcement has disturbed every aspect of their lives and now they may be speculating if they can keep their cool and balance. Of course reason of separation may be anything-doubt, confusion or misunderstanding- if you find yourself in such unwanted situation; you might be feeling scared and confused, not knowing what to do next. And the truth is that you are not alone. You will find lot of other people who are not willing to discuss this problem openly with others and are totally indecisive 'I do not know what to do. My marriage boat is rocking. It can sink any moment?
List of reasons for getting separated may be quite long. It may be rough and violent behaviors with each other, interference of third person in the relation, doubts on the character of each other, weak financial position of husband, wife not willing to live in joint family, excessive intervention of mother-in-law and so on.
It is easy to break relations but it is tough to prolong and maintain any relation. Understanding each other is the key to safeguard the relations. Married relations are more sensitive and continuous efforts are required to sustain this relation. Husband and wife may come from different set up of families. They may have different choices, attitudes and diverse level of thinking. Then how this relation can be continued smoothly? Even in case of love marriage where the loving pair has ample chances before marriage to consider and judge each other's level of thinking, attitude and habits, complain of disharmony in married life. Such couples are not forced to marry but they themselves opt to go for marriage as they find compatibility in the attitudes and behavior of each other. Where is the slip then?
Overlook the shortcomings of each others. Every person has shortcomings. Do not highlight these inadequacies. Sit and think what precisely is going wrong. Is there something else that your partner wants to reveal but is not willing to express to you? It may also be possible that you are totally in the dark about what is going on.
Conversation is the key to resolve such matters. You should not hesitate and immediately take initiative to discuss the problems with your partner. At least you should know the cause of the issue. Communication gap should not be allowed to spoil the relations. Every couple is capable to resolving their disputes and misunderstandings with mutual dialogues. Third party interference should never be permitted in any case. Third party may be some friend or some important dear relations. Such intrusion will surely spoil the situation and may even kill the marriage permanently.
Rather you can visit a Marriage Counselor and get his valuable suggestions. Acting upon the advice of an expert, you may have to compromise something. Though, it may be a tough task, but do not forget, you are saving your marriage, yourself and lot as well.
Nothing will work as good as your own efforts and understanding. You should be true and honest while attempting to solve the issues. This route requires patience and determination. You should also be ready to change and adjust yourself in the situation. If sustained efforts in positive directions are made, things will work out for the better.
Sometimes, it has been observed that separation provides the necessary space to the couples to re-think about the relations in a positive way and helps a couple to come out of the mess. This space helps them to bring the necessary changes in themselves making way for reconciliation.
Separation in married life is curse for the children. Such couples should not forget their responsibilities towards their children. Children also have a difficult time dealing with a separation when one parent is suddenly absent. Whether the separation is a matter of choice or necessity, it is critical to talk with your kids about it. In such cases, you should spend time with your children. Reassure them that both parents still love them. Remember, your children are also suffering along with you due to marriage separation.
Keep a positive attitude. It is very easy to get depressed in such situations.